Re: Coming out of the Crossdresser's closet

On Wed, 3 Dec 2003 00:21:56 +0000 (UTC), "Rikki Ward" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
wrote:
>Laura, on the other hand you seem to be saying that there is no problem with
>being Transgendered. 

There isn't... you don't get sick and you don't die and it isn't hurting
anyone... how can it possibly be a problem?  If you are able to relax into it
the whole thing very quickly becomes a non-issue.  And even for those who find
it distressing, most often the problem is *transphobia* internalized and
self-applied, that causes all the problems.  It is the failure to accept
oneself that causes the distress, not the transgender identity.

The real need here is to separate issues and be sure we are dealing with the
right things...  If we take someone who's all bent out of shape over being
transgendered and then go off treating transgender identity as the source of
the problem, not only do we misidentify the problem  we run the risk of
exacerbating the real problems of self-rejection, Internalized Transphobia,
etc. by further convincing the individual they are all screwed up.

Once again... the mistake is treating a non-symptomatic state of existence as
a problem when in fact the real problems lie in a belief structure accumulated
from the society around us.  People don't feel like shit because they are
transgendered... they feel like shit because they are taught to feel like
shit.


>>From personal experience I know there is. 
> ... 
>During depression
>brought about by lack of self-esteem (after a divorce and its fallout)
>counselling helped me go to my first Crossdresing Support group meeting,
>then become more confident in myself, so should not be discounted because of
>your experience.

So you are attributing a depression brought on by divorce to your transgender
identity?  Ummm... methinks that one needs a little more thought, hon.

I know counselors who do a wonderful job of helping people with some god awful
problems... I've seen people on the brink of self-termination brought back to
a happy life by good shrinks.  It is only on this one issue, the transgender
one, where I believe they don't know their asses from a hole in the ground.
Gene's obvious misunderstanding is a prime example and there are thousands
more just like him floating around out there.

----- 

Laura