Open Chess Tournament Los Angeles

This is a Summons to Chess Tourney!
     Are you an utterly obsequious coward?
     We, the partisans, paladins, and protagonists of the Exposition
Park Chess Club very greatly desire the attendance of brave chess
players.
     This coming first Sunday of the month, Dec. 7th, will be the
occasion of a free, unrated, three-round, chess tournament. Cash
prizes will *NOT* be awarded, but the names of the winners will be
published in the Los Angeles area print media, posted transnationally
in this Usenet newsgroup, and celebrated worldwide on our chess club's
Web site [http://chess.expoparkla.com/]. Indeed, early registration
for the tournament is easiest by visiting our Web site; Follow the
link "online signup".
     Players of all skill levels, from beginner to rated Master, are
invited to compete in this tournament. It will begin promptly at 1:30
PM and end at 4:30 PM at the Exposition Park Library, located in close
vicinity to the University of Southern California
[http://www.lapl.org/branches/maps/06-m.html].
The Library's address is:

     Exposition Park Regional Library
     3665 S. Vermont Avenue
     Los Angeles, California 90007
     Tel: 1 323 732 0169
     Fax: 1 213 612 0540

     The Library, with its ample lot parking, opens on Sundays at 1:00
PM, the same time at which in-person registration begins. Competitors
should arrive early so that no delays occur.
     By playing in this tournament you will develop a more positive
disposition, have more enlightening dreams, conceive more daring
plans, become a more passionately joyous lover, persuade the polluters
to nominate Ralph Nader for President - well, maybe not the
polluters-Nader thing.
     In any case, arise ye victims of repression! You have have
nothing to lose but your shyness!
P.S.: Because of the large attendance at various of our previous
tournaments, it is strongly urged that, to be certain of being able to
play in the tournament, your should BRING YOUR OWN CHESS SET, BOARD,
AND CLOCK!