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"Surrender, Ultimate Emperor!" the Ultimate Soldier said.
"Who dares?" the Ultimate Emperor asked.
"We do!" Penultimate Ninja told him.
"And who are you?"
"We are you!" the Ultimate Soldier said as he took off his mask to
reveal what the Ultimate Emperor saw to be his own face.
"We both are!" Penultimate Ninja said, doing likewise.
"What the heck is going on?" the Ultimate Emperor asked. "Has the
world gone mad?"
"Indeed it has," Excess told him as she suddenly appeared amongst
them, "and the one last chance I have of setting things right rests on
the three of you being willing to work together!"
Flame Wars VI #6
Conclusions
By Martin Phipps and Jesse N. Willey
"Work together to do what?" the Ultimate Emperor asked, sounding
strangely intrigued.
Excess sighed deeply, realizing that she had to explain herself all
over again. "The Anti-Moderator has been destroying all imprints
which he considers unworthy. As a side effect, the remaining
realities have been collapsing in on each other. If we don't stop him
soon then the changes will be permanent and, frankly, I don't believe
any of you want that."
"What do you want us to do?" the Ultimate Soldier asked.
"I tried before going up against the Anti-Moderator with an army of
net.heroes that were amalgamations of not only different Looniverses
but even different imprints on RACC. I was not successful. I now
realize that I was being too ambitious, that an amalgamation of five
different alt.versions of Ultimate Ninja alone should be sufficient to
defeat the Anti-Moderator."
"Five?" Penultimate Ninja asked. "But there's only three of us."
"No," Excess told him, "five." At her command, two more figures
appeared, one dressed in the familiar black costume of the Ultimate
Ninja and carrying his Ginsu katana blade and the other covered from
head to toe in black leather fetish gear and carrying a whip. "Behold
the Ultimate Ninja and the Ultimate Gimp!"
"Alright, what's going on?" Ultimate Ninja asked. The Ultimate Gimp
didn't say anything because the zipper over his mouth was closed.
Excess explained herself one more time so that all five of them would
understand what was being asked of them. "Are you all ready?" she
asked.
"Yeah, sure!" the Ultimate Gimp said, having opened the zipper which
had been preventing him from speaking. "Let's go for it!"
Excess called upon her cosmic powers and drew the five of them closer
and closer together until they coalesced into a single net.hero.
"Behold... ULTIMATE wREAM!"
Ultimate wReam looked like Ultimate Ninja wearing a dark blue costume
and carrying both a katana and a whip. In reality, this amalgamation
of Ultimate Ninja, Ultimate Soldier, Ultimate Emperor, Penultimate
Ninja and the Ultimate Gimp had the power of all five of them
combined.
"It's time," he said.
The Anti-Moderator looked down onto the new world he had created and
smiled. His efforts had been rewarded beyond his wildest dreams: not
only would writers no longer be able to continue with the imprints he
considered unworthy but no new imprints would be created for RACC
without having them automatically become part of this huge shared
Looniverse in which he, himself, would be God!
But wait! He sensed that Excess had one more plan up her sleave: she
was sending the Ultimate Ninja to assassinate him. He was coming
alone. The Anti-Moderator laughed. This mere net.hero was beneath
his notice. He simply sent a few headhunters to deal with him.
Ultimate wReam dealt with those headhunters with ease. The
Anti-Moderator sent a few more. Ultimate wReam dealt with those
likewise. Ultimate wReam was getting closer and the Anti-Moderator
was getting annoyed. The Looniverse was almost perfect and, by the
time this issue would be over, the changes would become permanent.
The Anti-Moderator, knowing that Ultimate Ninja couldn't hurt him,
decided to hold off on sending in the Ultimate Headhunter. Too many
Ultimate Ninja's in such close proximity would damage his closely
sculpted Looniverse.
"Congratulations, Ultimate Ninja!" the Anti-Moderator said. "I'm
very impressed to see you having made it so far."
"It's over," Ultimate wReam said with bravado.
"You're quite right about that," the Anti-Moderator said, laughing.
"It's over and I've won!"
"I don't think so!" Ultimate wReam said and then lunged forward.
The Anti-Moderator was going to put up a force field between himself
and the net.hero but Ultimate wReam had already closed the distance
between them. The Anti-Moderator was impressed by the net.heroes
speed. Then he realized that the net.hero had already impaled him
with his katana blade.
"That... hurts," the Anti-Moderator complained. "But how? I'm a
cosmic being! You shouldn't be able to hurt me!"
"Wrong!" Ultimate wReam told him. "I'm not merely Ultimate Ninja!
I'm the amalgamation of Ultimate Ninja, Ultimate Soldier, Ultimate
Emperor, Penultimate Ninja and the Ultimate Gimp and not only can I
hurt you, I can kill you!"
The Anit-Moderator was running scared. He decided to risk it. The
Ulitmate Headhunter snuck up behind Ultimate wReam and sliced off his
limbs. The Anti-Moderator laughed gleefully.
********
Excess looked on in despair. She had one last shot at this. She
could make one last amalgam. She looked around. The closest group
of alternates were Electra, Erin Joy, and Teenfactor's Carolyn Forge.
Excess knew Electra's mind had to be the dominant one. The other two
didn't have it in them to do what had to be done.
"Why did you do this to us?" said Ultimate Electra.
"Just go... backwards in time. If a weakened Anti-Moderator still has
enough energy to undo stuff... I just might be able to as well," Excess
said. The merged Carolyn Forge went back in time. "Hurry, your
amalgamation is not stable."
*********
Carolyn shot a lightning bolt at Ultimate Headhunter. His body
shook. He turned around to face her, chopping off Ultimate wReam's
thumb.
"I will kill you!" The Ultimate Headhunter said.
"Pshah, right," said Ultimate Electra.
"I know your amalgamation isn't stable...," he said grabbing her and
jacking her up.
"It only has to be long enough for me to do this," said Ultimate
Electra.
She did a palm strike to the undead Ultimate Ninja's crotch. The
lower part of the behemoth's body exploded as she added a lightning
bolt in. At that same moment, Ultimate wReam's battle ended.
The Anti-Moderator collapsed, no longer being able to stand. It was
then that the Anti-Moderator realized he was dying.
"You fool! By killing me, you have destroyed everything!" The
Anti-Moderator died.
Then everything went white.
*************
Electra was alone in the white. Erin Joy lay beside her bleeding.
Sharp bone fragments from the Ultimate Headhunter were sticking out
of her side.
"I wish I could tell you about the road ahead," Erin said. "About
how you'll set things right. How you just made the first step."
"Shush... we have to get you to a hospital," she said.
"I don't make it. I remember that very well. You might though.
I've done something to ensure that," she said.
"Shush..." Electra said.
Erin's body began to crackle with energy. Electra still held her
body as energy began to crackle through her.
"Remember me..." Erin whispered as her body vanished.
****************
Ultimate Ninja woke up in his office once again. He took a look at
his costume and noticed that he was back to normal. He wondered for a
moment if all that happened were a dream. He decided to leave his
office and head to the monitoring room where he found wReamHack.
"Report!" he ordered.
"Everything seems to be back to normal," wReamHack told him,
"except some imprints are gone for good." He turned to face his
leader. "I assume all the bad guys have been dealt with?"
"Once again, the LNH came through and saved the day," Ultimate Ninja
said confidently. As usual, he never betrayed the slighted doubt to
those under his command.
"Um... guys?" asked Vel. "Who are The Teacher Legion and why is their
sign on the front of our headquarters?"
THE END?
Ulitmate Ninja was created by wReam. His variants were created by
various people. Anti-Moderator created by Martin Phipps. Excess
created by Jesse N. Willey. Electra and Carolyn Forge created by Tom
Russell Jnr. Erin Joy is the LNH2 version of Electra. The Teacher
Legion created by Dane Martin.
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