Re: No AAA member, what if I get a flat tire?

Earlier I wrote:

[ tire change took almost two hours ]

: Now how in the name of Charles Goodyear could somebody
: screw up a simple tire change to the degree that it got
: dragged out for close to two hours?  I mean, the principle
: is obvious "by inspection," as the mathematicians like to
: say.  


DrPimpDaddi <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> sputters:

> First of all, know-it-all shithead, it doesn't take a rocket
> scientist to change a flat, nor a preparation or a practice run.

And yet, you still managed to plummer it to a fare-the-well anyway.
Astounding.  You could probably screw up a wet dream.


> Secondly, the shoulder was an uneven dirt field, so the car kept
> slipping off the stand. Almost ended up crushing my hand. Oh, I 
> bet that wouldn't deter a Mario Andretti pit crew member like
> yourself.

No, because I'd have the cool head and the presence of mind to 
find a more suitable spot in the first place, rather than just
panicking and doddering onto the first wide spot in the road
that crossed my line of sight, while screaming like Shelley
Winters.  Contrary to what you appear to believe, a car can be
driven on a flat tire; just not driven _fast_.  

(It might interest you to know that I am, in fact, a crew
member on a racing team.  Note my Organization: line above.
Not that I needed to achieve that lofty status in order to 
learn how to change a tire, of course.)


> Thirdly, if I had AAA, I'd have been back on the road in less
> than 30 minutes. 

Goosepiddle.  It would probably take longer than that for AAA
to even arrive -- *definitely* longer than that if you had a
flat during commute hours.  If you knew how to change a tire
yourself, on the other hand, you could be on your way inside
of fifteen minutes.  Assuming you didn't botch it and have
to enlist the assistance of a passing Girl Scout, of course.


> Wow, you are one stupid condecending asshole, ain't ya.

Stupid?  It would appear that I'm certainly intelligent enough
to put *you* on the defensive, spud.

As for condescending, some people (that would be you) _deserve_
to be condescended to.  


> Your mama must've been very proud when you changed your first
> tire.

Actually, my mama died before I was old enough to drive.  I bet
you feel about an inch tall now, don't you, Joe Sensitive?  Heh...


> I'll bet that's the biggest accomplishment in your pathetic
> little life.

This, from a "man" who's never even learned how to change a
tire.  

An adult male human should know how to do certain things, among
them changing a tire without assistance.  There it bloody is.

And before you start with the "Oh, you're _such_ a macho man!"
quip that's become the standard rejoinder nowadays anytime
someone dares to mention masculinity non-disparagingly, it 
isn't a matter of machismo; it's a matter of self-sufficiency,
self-respect, and basic life competence.  What was it Yoda said?
"Do, or do not do.  There is no 'try.'"

Now get out there and pull one for the Gripper.



Geoff

-- 
My Child Was Fascist Of the Month
At Rudolf Hess Elementary School